No matter if you are flat-sharing with your friends, absolute strangers or family members, there are always unspoken rules that you must never ever break.
OneRoof talked to experienced flatties to find out dos and don’ts of house sharing, and some of the no-nos were quite surprising.
Sara Leitao, 27, has changed flats nine times in the last eight years and has experienced flat-shares all over New Zealand, including in Palmerston North, Wellington, Hamilton, Tauranga, Queenstown and Auckland.
Her number one, two three and four rule is stay on top of cleaning.
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Sara’s flat has a cleaning roster, but she believes it's still a team effort. "Even when you know it’s not your responsibility to clean, don’t leave a mess behind just because it’s someone else’s job to clean up," she says.
“Change the toilet roll, take your washing out of the washing machine and clean the hair out of the shower - common sense stuff.”
Sara's flat also has a shower roster because her flatmates all have get out of the house at the same time. She says her allotted time is before 7.30am, after which it's the turn of one of her flatmates. It doesn't always work, though.
“One flatmate jumped in at 7.15am one morning and ruined the whole system,” she says.
Eating and cooking in your bedroom can also cause chaos and bad feelings among flatmates. “It’s that one door that’s always closed. You see it open and find half of the kitchen is there,” Sara says.
When expecting visitors, give your flatties a heads-up, especially if it’s late in the day, so they don’t have a freak out thinking someone is breaking into the place.
Sara had a situation when she got home to a stranger walking around the house and unpacking. A flatmate in charge of a tenancy had picked someone to fill a room but didn’t let others know.
When living in Queenstown, Sara had the “most unusual flatting situation”.
She was sharing with four others and a dog, and the flat had no rules and no keys.
"It was just such a chill and friendly town a lot of people didn’t lock their homes,” Sara says.
One night a drunken guy broke in and crashed on the couch. He did make scrambled eggs in the morning before he left, says Sara.
“One of my flatmates was like, 'Whose friend crashed here last night? He was so cool, made the best eggs too.'"
Food can be a source of tension, especially if it magically disappears. Scottish traveller Lauren White, who was sharing a three-bedroom Queenstown house, says a house guest once cleaned her out of cereal and left her fuming.
“A girl was staying with us for two weeks and she ate my cereal. I rely on it being there when I have my breakfast at 6am. It’s a small thing but just ask,” she says.
Not communicating with your flatmates can often be a source of tension. When your other flatmates work different hours to you, being able to have quick word with them about flat stuff can be difficult, but a group chat on social media or a white board with messages can be a way around this - just be careful what you write, though.
“No one likes passive aggressive messages,” Lauren says.
Her flat also has an “open doors” policy. Always keeping room doors open provides a better flow in the house and enhances conversations. “Once the door is closed everyone knows not to invade that privacy,” she says.
Other top dos and don'ts from OneRoof's polling of flatmates include:
"Don’t have sex with your flatties"
"Don’t eat someone else’s Tim Tams."
“Don’t clip your nails in the same room as someone else having dinner.”
“Don't leave the washing in the machine for a week.”
“Don’t spend an hour in a shower.”
“Don’t play loud music on 4am on a Tuesday.”
“Don’t use a drier on a sunny day.”
“Do pay your rent on time.
“Remember to put toilet lid down if flatting with females.”
“Check the mailbox.”
“Take out the rubbish because it stinks.”
“Let your flatmates know if you are having a party.”