I have a confession to make. I love real estate, I love writing about real estate, but I have never ever watched The Block.
I have seen snippets, of course, and I know what it’s about, but because I don’t have a TV, and I’ve never seen a full episode.
So with that in mind, I thought it would be good to critique the houses from this season based solely on the photos from the listings, which went live on OneRoof.co.nz this week.
The first thing I see is the kitchen and it just doesn't gel. The mix of colours around it - blue on one side and yellow on the other - needs something simple to pull it all together. The marble is too busy to do that.
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What looks like a scullery appears to cut into the already narrow space making the kitchen look tight.
The lounge is OK. I like the dark blue wall at the back but the grey patterned side wall is too much, too busy. I think one feature wall is enough. It’s a shame because had the team done that the room would have been to die for, especially with those white light fittings.
The dining room is lovely, warm and inviting, and the mustard walls combined with the wood laminate flooring and natural fittings add to the feeling of intimacy.
The outdoor area and the bedrooms aren’t bad but aren’t exciting either but before you think I’m being too harsh on Claire and Agni, I've got to say I love, love, love the bathrooms. They look like a place in which to relax. The black taps look amazing, and those built-in plant hangings providing wee fern groves in the walls are stunning.
VERDICT 6.5/10
This is the home built by the all-male team and I like it. The dark kitchen is gorgeous, and feels like a place that’s fit for cooking, talking and making. There’s a deep inviting hearth that ties in beautifully with the white dining area and the sleek wood panelling - modern yet natural - which almost directs the eyes to the simple yet cosy outdoor space.
The layout of the lounge is, to my mind, perfect. Everyone can see the TV, the space to hang out is cosy, not squished and you can see through the lovely wall of windows out across the leafy neighbourhood.
I give kudos for the spa, but I know enough about the program to suspect they probably won it, so no comment.
The bedrooms are a mixed bag. The master and the ensuite seem to have gotten all the attention. The master bedroom boasts simple, clean lines and cool fittings but those steel-framed mirrored wardrobe doors aren’t to my taste. Surely just one of those would have done. Also, the bathroom is a bit too black - how would you wake up in the morning?
As for the other bedrooms - one is too dark and oppressive and the other looks like it has been thrown together. One more hint on this house - make sure you watch the video on the listing to see the second bathroom - it's one of the most stunning I have ever seen.
VERDICT 8.5/10
First impressions: too much pink! But on second view my eyes warm to it. It's not really pink per-se, more a terracotta hue.
The dark of the kitchen again drew me in and, for someone who has spent hours planning my own perfectly fresh white-on-white with some more white kitchen, this love of the dark is surprising, and welcome.
Chlo and Em's kitchen feels like an enticing and calming place to prepare your food and relax. The wood panelling tie the darker colours together and the light fittings really pop.
The outdoor space is light and rustic and has a direct line of sight to the kitchen - perfect for entertaining, though someone could have chucked a nice pot plant in front of the exposed piping.
The lounge is pleasant and the simple shelving around the TV and the bespoke furniture do most of the talking.
The bathrooms are nice without any real wow factor, as are the bedrooms, although the pink colour of one puts me off.
VERDICT 7/10
I like this house. The kitchen has some really cool points and parts of it remind me of the Scandinavian concept of “hygge”. It's crisp and sunny and helped in no small part by the simple wood panelling and the glorious mustard tiling.
But the taps just ruin the look for me, and the heavy black light looks weirdly oppressive.
The lounge look fine, but I’m not a huge fan of beige, and the heavy grey curtain tends to overshadow the rest of the room. On a brighter note, the glass doors offer a cool outlook onto Hobsonville's original army housing, which is picture-perfect cute.
The bedrooms are fine, apart from the pink of course, and you can see how easy it would be for new buyers to bring their own personal touches to these rooms.
This brings me to the part which I just can't get past. The design of the bathrooms. One has big green tiles, next to uneven white brick sized ones, with a patterned floor and dimpled glass shower wall. And if that doesn’t seem like too much, the heavy looking black fittings just push things over the edge. The other bathroom just has too many patterned tiles.
I do love the little nooks and crannies in this house. The little reading-cum-desk space in the hallway is perfect and the attic snug is a thoughtful addition.
VERDICT 8/10
All four houses will be auctioned on site at 7pm on September 30.